The New Sim Is Done!!!!!

     As you know, about 2 weeks ago, I bought a homestead sim..... limited to 3750 prims, and gotta watch the number of scripts and the number of visitors, but still ..... MINE to do with as I will.  And, as promised, here are the pics..... I leave it open to the public, and just ask that you respect it.  HeeHee. 
     I just installed a new graphics card today, to go with the new quad-core puter.   I can honestly say that I have never, EVER  seen Second Life before.... I spent the evening hopping from sim to sim, re-familiarizing myself with old faves, and some new ones, all the while squeeling to Aso in VC (like a twelve year old girl...rofl)  about "OH, my god, you should see these textures!  (and similar....rofl).  It's simply amazing!

Anyway...... here are the pics, and here's the LM... hope y'all like it!

*Peace*

Tel

Fantasy Area

Neko Playground

Main Gathering Place

Main House

Had NO Idea Tel was THIS Smexy!  ROFL!

Update on the house, and miscellaneous.....

     Well, the workers are ALMOST done with the living room... then comes MY part.  Cleaning, painting, stripping/sanding/refinishing the hardwood floors..... sheesh..... and the insurance company is only gonna store my furniture until the 19th of Feb., although I can extend that a bit, my rep says.  Hope to have it all done by then.
     I ordered my new quad-core, 2 TB HD, 10 gig ram  puter yesterday.... supposed to be in this afternoon.  Should be interesting to see what SL REALLY looks like..LOL!  I bet that Spanki's photos look ever better, and Aso's clothing will be even more fab.  *grins*   The new sim, my homestead sim that I got a coupla weeks ago, is just about ready to open.  My rezday for this AV, Teleny, is Monday, so I'm thinkin' about havin' a little revolving shindig... can't have everyone at once, because of the limits on a homestead, but I think a day long party is just the thing!  That way, I can hit all three "shifts" of my SL buddies, so y'all can come back laterz and play!
     It's divided into three sections... Human... the largest area, a Tiki-style beach, with absolutely lovely buildings and such from Tiki Tattoo..... if you're not familiar with their work, you should check them out.  Their graphics textures are amazing, and the builds are all wonderful.  Very detailed.  The little Neko area, a nod to my time spent as a kitteh with Aso, and for all my kitteh friends, is tiny, but so are we, eh?  The second largest area revitalizes the old Fae area from the Keep days in Northfarthing.  It's kinda a fantasy area, with a huge hollow tree, a really strangely, but beautifully done tree house, and a merperson area.  I hope y'all like it !  I'll try to get some pics, and post 'em later!
   Best news of all, lately, is that Aruin is BACK!  My BFF, former business partner at the keep, is back, with both his AV's.  Been about 4 months, I think, since I've talked to him anywhere except on Facebook.  Welcome back, Cuzzin'!  *Biggest Damn Smoochies in the WORLD!*

*PEACE!*

Tel

Today's Ramble...... Alts.

     My friend Corinda recently wrote about the subject of alts on her blog, and that set me to thinking.  All of her points were very valid, and I think need to be reiterated here, and, knowing me, I'll add my own two cents worth. LOL!
     She made mention of the fact that the majority of us do NOT use them maliciously, and that those that do, are toxic in their main personalities as well.  Excellent point.  I am a known Sybil-type personality.  I have three known alts.... Tel, my "main"... Gany, who was created as a "model" originally for my av styling biz, then took on a personality of his own, and Sidd, my female, who was originally an experiment, to see if I could make a good female AV, and a way to hide from people.  She is sexless, although partnered to the female alt of one of my best friends, now absent from SL for over three months, who used his to hide, too, when "she" dj'd.  We did that just to add to the "reality" of their existence.  Cross-gender alts are the main subject of this post.
     I know several people that use cross-gender alts for various reasons.  RP is one.  One of my best buddies on here is actually female, but plays one HELL of a mean pirate dude.  One of them is male, and has a female that he uses for MM boards, just for fun, and to poke a little fun at the guys that are always hitting on EVERY  female that comes along.  "Asshats and Idiots" as he says.  It's all in good fun, and he NEVER, being heterosexual himself, "sleeps" with them.  I have one straight friend on here, who is so bashful that he can't even approach women sexually in SL.  He has a female alt, too.  I'll let you figger the rest of THAT one out on your own.  *grins*  His business, and no one gets hurt.
     As a gay man, I understand the attraction that some feel for heterosexual men, but it is WRONG on SO many levels to pose as a female on SL, just to get laid.  Taking advantage of others is never a good thing, nor is it productive in the long run.   If you can't get any as a man, then look for the reasons for that.  You cannot hide as a female, have sex with the guys, then feel good about yourself.  Just don't see how.  I recently unfriended someone when I found out that they were doing this to people, after a heated discussion.  I take this very personally, because a dear dear friend of mine LEFT SL because his "girlfriend" turned out to be a man posing.  While there are some that, I'm sure, use the female guise on SL as kind of a way of "testing the waters" before a RL transformation, which is all well and good, you really should let people know, if it goes into something resembling a relationship.  My friend would have been fine if he'd known, he says.  The av that he was involved with "felt" female to him.
     Point is, I think, friends, is that some straight people have a hard time wrapping their minds around the whole "gender identity" issue that some gay people deal with.  We've worked SO very hard for the last 40yrs or so to be accepted and understood, at times even welcomed as who and what we are.  This type of behavior, though, can set us back.  WAY back.
     Well, just my personal ramblings while still hurting from losing two friends over this issue.  Sometimes, it just helps to flush the shit into the blog sewer, and let it drift away.

 *Peace and love, y'all*
            Tel








  (btw, my two unknown alts are for specific reasons.... one is totally undevelopped, and is my "banker" to keep me from too much impulse spending...lol.... the other?  A long unused Furry.  Hasn't even been on since probably April, '09.)

Funny, ain't it?

     It's really funny, ain't it?  When things are actually going well, you don't write as much about it.  My life has taken a new direction, with the lay off, and I've certainly been through the emotional ringer, both RL and SL, but think that I'm coming out the other side, still wrinkled...lol.... but fresher and cleaner in the mindset, anyway. 
     The work on the house if PAINFULLY slow, now, by appearances.  My contractor does emergency work, too, and hasn't been here for two days, because of people that needed new roofs because of tree damage, or one lady that needed her electric fixed after a water leak, etc.  I understand this, but it's down to the "finish work"... i.e. wallboard taping and sanding.... cleaning.... clearing out old junk piles..... cleaning.... painting (inside).... cleaning... oh, did I mention cleaning?  ROFL!  This work, while moving along nicely, moves slowly, as these guys are perfectionists, and my OCD probably is driving them crazy.  HA!!  ("You see that small wrinkle in that mud tape in that dark corner beside the window that no one but ME will EVER notice?"  That's the kind of stuff that I'm talking about.) Now maybe that's being a BIT picky, for someone that's also yelling "HURRRRRRRRY!!!!!!"  at the top of his lungs, but still, they ARE being WELL paid by my insurance company, and need to send part of the crew down daily, I think.  It does not take eight men to change a lightbulb.  *grins*
     On the job front, I'm not in a really big hurry.  It turns out that the insurance money that I will be pocketing by doing the work myself, partly, is almost half a year's pay.  That gives me some freedom to wait, to find the RIGHT job, and not just rush out and work at Wally World, or Mickey D's.  Unless I just get bored, which I don't see happening, not with two rooms of a house to completely redo, and then, since I'm switching my studio and bedroom around...(thank you, Mike F. for the FREE new electrical hookups while you were doing this job anyway!)... I'll have to redo the old studio, to make it look more like a bedroom.... and then I'll have to redo the half bath there to match.... *sigh*   "Why do I do this to myself?"  ROFL!
     On the personal front, things are looking good, and moving right along.  Love is a good thing, whether for family, friends, a partner, what or whom ever.  I highly recommend it to everyone.  *smiles*  It makes you cry sometimes, but the laughter and warmth balance that out many fold.
     As far as SL goes, with Aso taking some RL time for himself, I've gotten bored and lonely, a bit.  I've got good friends, but now have PLENTY of time on  my hands, so I've taken up sim design again.  I've redone two sims for people just since Saturday past, not completely, but both are about 90%.  Kinda proud of that.  Maybe I'll even reopen my business that I used to have doing that, and see if I can make Tel self-supporting again.  I dunno, he's pretty high maintenance!   HAHAHAHAHHA!
     Love you all, and peace out!

               Tel

(Here's a pic of me, Aso and our buddy Joy just sitting on the porch in SL, while we had one HELLUVA "Collapse" battle going on on Facebook.... lol.... we do that so we can chat, while off in other worlds playing, too.  BTW, I'm WINNING! *for the moment, until Aso figgers out the strategy to it.... he ALWAYS has the highest score in "Bejeweled Quest". We don't even try any more.  Last week, his score was over 400k!  The Asoninator!)

An Ending, and a Fresh Outlook.......

   The Diner is closing.  It's official.  The old girl is getting a makeover.  The owners are closing us down today, after lunch, for a MAJOR remodel, and for the first time since 1908, when she was established, there will be no Rogers Diner here in Madison.  Kinda makes you sad, but let's hope that whatever they decide to reopen (it will be a restaurant, probably mid-scale Italian, with a limited lunch menu that still has some burgers, and so on) is competetive enough stay alive in this economy.  Lord knows how I've tried over the years to keep Rogers afloat.  Tourists love us, and we have many wonderful regular customers, but the twice removed previous owners had run the reputation (quality, service, cleanliness... all three had suffered horribly!) into the ground to the point that we never fully recovered.  We tried, and doubled business, but it was just not enough.
  That being said, I'm scared shitless to be on the job market at age 48 again, and in a very small city. (Pop: 13000ish)  I'm trying to maintain a positive attitude about this.
   Instead of using the insurance money "leftovers" that I will have by doing some of the work on the house myself, after the major part of the rebuild is done, to put a down payment on a (newish) car, I will use it for bills.  Unemployment pays very poorly in Indiana, although I think that it's gone up a bit since I last drew almost a decade ago.
   On the brighter side, I will have more time to work on the house, to do it right, and to save, perhaps, even a few more dollars.  We'll see, but I think that it will all balance out.  It depends on whether or not they bring me back after the 60+ day layoff.  I've heard rumors that they won't, that they have another cook in mind, who is friends/family with one of the owners.  Just have to wait and see.  At least, by then, the weather should be close to breaking for the year, and the heating bills should drop!
    Sorry I've not been in contact with many of you, my friends and family, in a while.  I've had a LOT of things going on, and a lot of things on my mind.  I think of you all every day, and hope to have some free time soon!

Just an update.....

The employers have decided NOT to close for the remodel, but to just work around the current schedule, a little at a time.  THIS should be interesting.

On the house front, the rewiring has come to a screeching halt, as we are waiting on the next insurance check. *sigh* 

I WANT MY LIFE BACK TO NORMAL! (whatever THAT is!  LOL!)

Quick update....

Off to work soon, but just a quick update:

The whole house needs to be rewired.  Seems that the last landlord that owned it before I bought it did some creative engineering in the electrical department.  Good news:  house will have all new wiring, and be up to code.
Bad news:  This is slowing down reconstruction considerably, and adding to the mess, what with cutting holes in walls and so on.

On the job front, my employers have gone back on their word to work us at another of their restaurants this winter during the remodel.  We are going to be layed off on unemployment in the middle of the winter for 4-6 weeks.  Boy, thank you for THAT! (not!)  Well, hopefully, my "financial cushion", small as it is will see me through this! (But, I'd REALLY like to just find a new job, I think!)  I'm gonna take 3-4 weeks off, though, maybe, and spend some time with friends, Aso, and working on the cosmetics here at the house, depending on the time schedule for the remodel both here and at work.

Catch y'all laters!  Have a GREAT day!

For you, Aso!

Oh, baby... this song just reminds me of US, on SO many levels.... the love, the fever, the heat, and yes, your desire to choke the living SHIT outta me at any given moment!   HAHAHAHAHAHA!  Omg, this is what life is all about... love, larfs, and fun!  Love you!  (and YES, I DO remember the first broadcast of this!  ROFL!)

Oh, I just HAD to.........

This way, you TOO can have it stuck in your head for DAYS AND DAYS AND DAYS!!!!

(the original and STILL the best version!)

Well, off to a start, anyway!

2009 was a horrible year for me, in many ways, but it started looking up towards the end, after I met Asoniel.  Perspective reinstated itsself, with practicality becoming the catchword.  Before that, I was kinda living "day to day", and paycheck to paycheck.  Didn't have any savings left, had pretty much nothing to show for it, except my house.  Then the fire took half of that, for all intents and purposes, forcing me to live in two rooms.  Hell, I've done it before, back in my twenties.  I've actually had apartments smaller than my current living space, but that was then.  This is now.

Loving someone, and wanting to provide the best possible setting for that love to flourish changes a person.  I'd forgotten, in the decade plus since David was taken away, how much so.  I now put money in the bank every paycheck, towards the purchase of a new(ish) car.  I haven't spent one thin DIME of that insurance check, except to pay the contractor, in order to get the work moving even faster.  I'm working very hard to find a new job, one with insurance, and one that allows me an occassional weekend off, so our visits are not all one way, with the onus of travel on him and the wear and tear on his automobile.  Soon, very soon, I will have hot water in my house again for the first time in over a year, and will actually have REAL heat!  Isn't it amazing the lessons that life teaches you:  when you think you've hit rock bottom, someone truly SPECIAL comes along, and you realize that life really IS worth living, and that mere existance is no longer an option.

You begin to make "plans" again in your head.  You no longer live day to day, you think about your future, his future, and your potential future together.  Those that say that homosexuals can't REALLY love one another, because there is no potential for offspring, and therefore no biological connection are dead wrong.  For years, that good old "Baptist upbringing" of my youth has led me to a deep self-loathing, and a need to "fit in" to society, that I hadn't even realized was there.  Losing David, and withdrawing from the world for about ten years didn't help either.  I had become set in my ways, and rather an old fogey, at just 48 yrs. of age.

Love has given me back my joi de vivre, my sense of humor, but above all, tolerance, patience, and kindness.  My mother and I have had a contentious relationship for most of my life.  We now can speak to each other without TOO much frustration.  My friends and co-workers tell me that I've changed, become
nicer, easier to get along with, and funnier.  Yes, my innate good nature, and sense of  "fun" is returning as well.  Morose is no longer tolerated in my self, and I try to see the lighter side of any situation.  I'm over drama, over "asshats and idiots" as our friend Bonzo says.  I even have found it within myself to kind of overlook the constant "gerbil and buttsex" jokes that my employers think are so damned funny, because I realize this is a form of ignorance on THEIR part, and not really directed at me personally, that I'm just the convenient "target" of  their own misguided attempts at amusing themselves, since no one else really is.

Lastly, and forgive this rambling stream of consciousness..... Loving Asoniel, in both worlds, has led me to love myself again.  I take better care of myself and my physical surroundings again.  I'm still dieting, or rather have started again.  I've lost over 40 lbs. in the last year, and am now trying to quit smoking... AGAIN!  This time, however, I'm doing it sensibly.  No cold turkey and 60 lb. weight gain this time... oh no!  I'm quitting the same way I started... one cigarette at a time.  When it reaches the habit stage, rather than just the addiction/chain smoking stage, I will put them down.  With his help, for good this time.

I want to thank the Almighty "Whatever Is Out There" for bringing him along when It did.  I was on a slow path of self-destruction, and hadn't even realized it fully, though there were warning signs.  Aso, you've given me reason to go on, to live, love and be happy again.  TRULY happy.  No matter what the future brings, for me, for you, for us.... that lesson, and so many more, has been learned, and once learned, will not be forgotten.  Thank you, and Love you!

Will I catch hell from some of my friends for this post?  Possibly.  There are those that feel that you should not mix RL and SL, or blogging and RL in general.  To me, a blog is a way of letting the world see and hear the things that you can not say out loud, or to share your thoughts and thought processes with your friends and loved ones.  If the rest of the world happens to read it, oh, well.  It is not MY problem if they don't agree.  If you don't like it, then don't read it.  Caveat Emptor!

Thank you to all that have stood by me in the past, and to those of you that have chosen to be part of my future.  While I've posted this song before, and it's primarily for you, Li'l Satelfteh, this also applies to ALL the people I love in my life.  Love is quite simple, actually.... a very basic emotion.  Just feel it, be glad for it, accept it when it's offered, and don't place strings or expectations on it.  I love you all, my dear friends, and Aso, you don't even need to be told how I feel.

Do like I do.... cry.  Yes, I've learned that again, too.  Not ALL tears are bad.  Cry out the bad, then cry because you're so damned happy.  It helps.  Trust me on this!

Peace out, ya'll!  *HUGS!*

Love you, Baby!