New Directions......

    The visitor counter resetting the other day, has had me thinking.  In my mind, I've reviewed the last year that I've spent, both RL and SL.  Until Jan. 10th, last year, I worked 45-60 hour weeks, earned a "decent" wage for my location, and being a family of one. (Not that the Fur Peoples that live in and out of the house don't count, but their tuition is less expensive!  *grins*)  Things were good, SL was, for the most part, fun, and an escape.  Now, as Ziggy so aptly put it on his blog, I'm back in the "Second Life Funk", a bit.
     After the layoff, I had the house to rebuild, after the December fire last year.  Trust me, that took my mind off both the RL unemployment, and spending too much time on SL.  For the last several months, SL has BEEN more like RL.... it's been the one constant.  I've watched my friends go through emotional traumas back to back to back to back... you get the picture... and because of deep, REAL friendships, have let that affect me emotionally, as well.  I have been aloof, in love, alone, and surrounded by caring people.  This microcosm that has turned into my macrocosm can both hurt, and heal, depending on the depths that we wish to participate in it.
    This is a bad time of year for me, as many of you that I'm close to already know.   The upcoming anniversary, for me and my deceased RL lover, my birthday, the approaching holidays.... beginning with Halloween, which used to be my favorite.... all of it, combined with the "Annual Fall Mood Swing"... makes mid-October throught mid-November a lot of fun. 
    Inworld, there are situations developing in my SLife that are making me uncomfortable, and might need some rethinking, and redirection as well.  I'll not discuss them openly, until I mull them through, and probably not even then, but they are there, and they need to be dealt with on many levels.
    In the REAL world, things actually might be looking up a bit.  I've had two of three interviews (three interviews?  For a shitty, barely above minimum wage job, in a management field that I've had 30 yrs. experience in?  Guess that shows you JUST how bad the local economy still is, and that for those hiring, it's a buyer's market, huh?), with the third scheduled next week.  There have been a few more local/semi-local listings on the websites, and in the papers.  And there's the Farmer.
    Yeah, funny time of year to start "not dating, but having daily contact again" for me.  He's been a blessing.  He's solid, both financially and emotionally, has a keen inquisitive mind, can DEFINITELY give me a run in the smartass department.. LOL!..  I think I might just let that ONE good positive thing play out, and see where it leads.  I guess that means there IS still hope in the world, so I'll try to concentrate on that.  Sometimes, I truly DO think "attitude is altitude."  Beats the old days, anyway, of seeking solace in a pill bottle, or a booze bottle, right?  *happy face and pat on the back for THAT, anyway!*
     Perhaps if/when I get back to work, and I see where this is going with the Farmer, SL will regain its luster a bit, and I can just relax and enjoy the ride again.  I hope so.... as I don't like the alternatives that are playing out in my mind.  (Throw in the drama caused by SL and the Labs, the server issues, etc... that is NOT helping, either.)

*Peace, and much love to all*
    Tel
(just some pics of the gardens, before I get them all cut down)