We worked (trial run) situation at the new restaurant last evening for four hours. Everyone made one thing off the menu. Only about 4 of us have any experience. I go back in at 9 this morning.... we are feeding the local muckety-mucks... about three HUNDRED of them. This should be fun..... lol!
On a brighter note or two... everyone (except one that I'm reserving judgement on.... I've worked with her before).... is really nice, and eager. AND the best part, at least this first week, I am on 9-5 the rest of the week, off on Sunday... so I'll get SOME time with a certain someone of the evening, hopefully! Yay!!!
(That's 6am-2pm SLT, btw).
Have a great day, kiddies!
*Employed, even if not paid handsomely*
Tel
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Monday, November 29, 2010
Lost in our own little world.....
Yesterday was interesting, to say the least. I got a group notice from Tizzy, over at ::TT Designs:: about an upgrade to her bed engine, and hopped over to check it out. Noticing that there wasn't a medieval/castle type version available, only very modern ones, and that she was on sim at the time, I IM's her about future releases. This led to one of the longest "AV tag games" in my SL history... LOL!
She offered to upgrade my current one, but since the positioning, etc. would be different, it would take a while. OK, no problems... I"m not SLexually active (yet) atm anyway, right?.... welll........ I had to log off for a bit. When I came back, she was afk..... for hours. LOL! Derren meanwhile logged on, and we were in IM, when Franzi IM'd me wanting me/us to come to the OOC dance at Tabor. Well, I didn't want to be away from Tizzy's sim, as I had all kinds of difficulties getting there in the first place, so I opted to tp Derren to me, where we ran through the poses (fully dressed! Give me some credit!) on the demo beds. These are simply amazing. 50 menus with over 520 poses! Wow!
Anyway, this was observed intently by a two day old noob. Poor fella. He tried to hard to get that three way menu, while Derren and I were giggling our asses off in IM. Finally, I decided to pop it up for him, just for the hell of it, but he ran off. However, Derren DID get one good shot. Heh.
She offered to upgrade my current one, but since the positioning, etc. would be different, it would take a while. OK, no problems... I"m not SLexually active (yet) atm anyway, right?.... welll........ I had to log off for a bit. When I came back, she was afk..... for hours. LOL! Derren meanwhile logged on, and we were in IM, when Franzi IM'd me wanting me/us to come to the OOC dance at Tabor. Well, I didn't want to be away from Tizzy's sim, as I had all kinds of difficulties getting there in the first place, so I opted to tp Derren to me, where we ran through the poses (fully dressed! Give me some credit!) on the demo beds. These are simply amazing. 50 menus with over 520 poses! Wow!
Anyway, this was observed intently by a two day old noob. Poor fella. He tried to hard to get that three way menu, while Derren and I were giggling our asses off in IM. Finally, I decided to pop it up for him, just for the hell of it, but he ran off. However, Derren DID get one good shot. Heh.
Ok, so it's raunchy, but it was funny as hell!
Well, after about an hour, I pulled Tabor up on the map, and saw it fairly empty so guessed we'd missed the dance. All this while I had been IM'in Tizzy, but w/o response. Just as we were ready to jump to his or my place one, Spanki IM'd me about a nekkie beach party. Well, since I haven't talked to my kid in a while, and wanted him and Derren to meet, I asked, D agreed, and we went. That was fun, and went really well. After that was over, we tp'd to my place for a hot bath, and a long talk. That was the highlight of the evening, of course. Our "alone and yakking" times have brought us much closer.
Well, after his boy had logged off, Franzi had visitors "down below". Perhaps some of the best RP of his life. (NOT! LOL!) Needless to say, the IM's were fast and furious, with him wanting to join us in the tub, so I could drown him. Ha! When he finally tp'd up for nekkie nainai's, he offered Derren a bow to shoot him. Pffffft! We were laughing so hard. After he logged, Derren and I tp'd to his new place, said hi to the kittens, and said our nainai's. It's gonna be hard to find time together this week, as both our RL's are gonna be hectic, but where there's a will, there's a way, right?
All in all, it was one of the best SL days I've had in a long time. Oh, and btw, Tizzy had fallen asleep on the couch, RL, and finally got back to me. Can't wait to try that bed out sometime. Now... if I could just find someone else willing....... (Grins... I KNOW you'll read that! HAHAHAHA!)
Finally, the night ended just as peacefully as it had begun hectically. Gotta love days like that, eh?
"Lost in our own little world."
*Peace out*
Tel
Sunday, November 28, 2010
Just a bit of Sunday bizarreness......
OK. Can't sleep, and this was in my email from a RL friend. It's just... well... it's just. That's about all I can say. LOL!
*Bizarrely yours*
Tel
*Bizarrely yours*
Tel
Saturday, November 27, 2010
Just freakin' great.....(RL post)
So, I move the furniture around in the living room, and go to get the Xmas stuff out. It's in a closet that only has it, and my very best clothing in it. I notice a wet sweater collar. I look up. Half the ceiling is collapsed, and there is black mold everywhere.
Gone..... over 3500$ (that's what the insurance estimate was originally, when I took the policies out) of antique family (irreplaceable, and either now with paint peeling or was cloth or paper) ornaments. Gone.... a large collection of antique European paper ornaments from the late 19th century. Gone.... about that amount of clothing. Armani tux.... black mold. ALL my cashmere sweaters... black mold. Brand new winter coat, bought when I was working a decent job last year at end of seaon, never worn... black mold. All my old college and high school memorabilia.. (diplomas, clothing, cap and gown, etc.) ruined or black mold.
No sign of roof damage (it's tin, and only about five years old), and I can't see inbetween my house and mom's where the damage is, as that's the end where there is only a 4" air space, and it's sealed. Can't even get the insurance guys here until Monday, when I am to supposed to have my final training session at the new job. Just Freakin' Great!
Happy Freakin' Holidays.... I can't take a whole lot more bullshit this year!
*Tel*
Gone..... over 3500$ (that's what the insurance estimate was originally, when I took the policies out) of antique family (irreplaceable, and either now with paint peeling or was cloth or paper) ornaments. Gone.... a large collection of antique European paper ornaments from the late 19th century. Gone.... about that amount of clothing. Armani tux.... black mold. ALL my cashmere sweaters... black mold. Brand new winter coat, bought when I was working a decent job last year at end of seaon, never worn... black mold. All my old college and high school memorabilia.. (diplomas, clothing, cap and gown, etc.) ruined or black mold.
No sign of roof damage (it's tin, and only about five years old), and I can't see inbetween my house and mom's where the damage is, as that's the end where there is only a 4" air space, and it's sealed. Can't even get the insurance guys here until Monday, when I am to supposed to have my final training session at the new job. Just Freakin' Great!
Happy Freakin' Holidays.... I can't take a whole lot more bullshit this year!
*Tel*
Friday, November 26, 2010
Heh.... yep, threepeat, I looked!
I introduced Derren to Beth's music at Hotlanta last night..... this is a better version of the same vid that I sent him the link to. (and also had dedicated to him at the club.... heehee.... smoooooth, Tel... just so smooooooth!*grins*)
Third time I've posted this, but damnnnnnn, ya can't get enough Beth!
*Just askin'!*
Tel
Thursday, November 25, 2010
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
The Fear.......(Second Life post, with a RL footnote)
I've been spending a lot of time with someone special lately. We've gotten very close, and yet are proceeding in a slow, pre-meditated fashion, writing and laying down in stone the rules as we go along. It's quite comfortable. We laugh. Laughter is a good thing, and has been in short supply the past couple of months.....
Last night we went to Immersiva..... Bryn Oh's amazing sim where she makes most of her machinimations. Her work, whether her builds, her poetry, her filming style, whatever.... are a bit dark and dissonant, but there is a *small* thread of hopefulness for something better in all of them. They *speak* to my soul on a very deep level, even though the sim itself has changed a bit since my last visit. The starting point to "The Rabbicorn" story is now in a small cave, rather hidden under the giant snake-like bones that cover about 80% of the sim, and the tower and vids for "Daughter of Gears" are there, of course, the main theme of the sim. Look EVERYWHERE if you go there. There are vid links, and other surprises everywhere..... and yeah, it's a pain in the butt the first time, but DO make sure you reset your sky settings as she recommends. I saved them, and used them elsewhere.... kinda neat.
Anyway, back on topic..... I haven't had a "romance" in a while, but this vid of Bryn's kinda sums it up. (I think it was her first machinima, and not as perfect as her current ones, but it's simplicity *works* for me.)
I've been hurt. He's been hurt. This will take a while, but, as this Moby song says...."Wait for me."
It is scaring the hell out of me, and I wouldn't trade it for all the pixels in the world, right now. *smiles*
Last night we went to Immersiva..... Bryn Oh's amazing sim where she makes most of her machinimations. Her work, whether her builds, her poetry, her filming style, whatever.... are a bit dark and dissonant, but there is a *small* thread of hopefulness for something better in all of them. They *speak* to my soul on a very deep level, even though the sim itself has changed a bit since my last visit. The starting point to "The Rabbicorn" story is now in a small cave, rather hidden under the giant snake-like bones that cover about 80% of the sim, and the tower and vids for "Daughter of Gears" are there, of course, the main theme of the sim. Look EVERYWHERE if you go there. There are vid links, and other surprises everywhere..... and yeah, it's a pain in the butt the first time, but DO make sure you reset your sky settings as she recommends. I saved them, and used them elsewhere.... kinda neat.
Anyway, back on topic..... I haven't had a "romance" in a while, but this vid of Bryn's kinda sums it up. (I think it was her first machinima, and not as perfect as her current ones, but it's simplicity *works* for me.)
I've been hurt. He's been hurt. This will take a while, but, as this Moby song says...."Wait for me."
It is scaring the hell out of me, and I wouldn't trade it for all the pixels in the world, right now. *smiles*
(End Second Life Transmission..... signing off.)
____________________________________________________________________
(Begin Real Life Transmission..... signing on.)
Well, I officially start training at the new job Friday. I *think* I'll have this one last weekend free, then we have another intensive training session Monday evening, and Tuesday we open for an invitation-only lunch for local business people, the Mayor, etc. (Which, as middle management, is kind of good for me, since I know all of the folks from having been in the biz here for years.... lol) I am not positive of my schedule, yet, and it will probably be flexible. *le sigh... I'm a creature of habit, and would LOVE a set schedule again, but at this point, it's a job, right? Not that many of them out there these days! This will eat into my SL time greatly, but RL has to come first. The worst part, though, is that I think I'll be working mostly evenings and weekends, which is when my SL closest friends are on. They understand the necessity, of course, but I will miss talking to them daily. Ah, well, we all know several ways to contact each other.
Here's a humorous note.... when my RL "not yet a boyfriend" is over, and I'm on SL, he asks me to say Hi to my SL "not yet a boyfriend" for him, and vice versa. I find that not only amusing, but incredibly sweet and understanding, knowing how so many people have to "hide" their SL from their RL partners, etc. I know that SL has broken up relationships RL before, and also the reverse. We had our first fight last week, which had nothing to do with SL, and we survived it, and it only strengthened our feelings. I think I'll keep this one around a while. *Smiles contentedly*
Here's a great cover of one of my fave Lily Allen songs.... just thought I'd pass it along!
*Good days again!*
Tel
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Clubbing With Derren.....
Finally! I have been needing a Hotlanta Blues Club fix. Badly. Derren and I finally just took an evening, and went there. Damn the torpedoes and full speed ahead! LOL!
As usual, I don't have the SLurl handy, but it's the Hotlanta Blues Club, located high above the sim Northfarthing, which was Tel's first home on SL. The owner, DonPaul Cale, who is still a wonderful friend, owns both the sim and the club. Hotlanta is one of the busiest clubs of its kind in SL, but the sim below, being medieval in nature, is also quite unique. DP, or "Boss" as I still call him, is a graphics person IRL, and has several really nice builds on the themed part of the main sim. Please check it out, before you hit the club!
As usual, I don't have the SLurl handy, but it's the Hotlanta Blues Club, located high above the sim Northfarthing, which was Tel's first home on SL. The owner, DonPaul Cale, who is still a wonderful friend, owns both the sim and the club. Hotlanta is one of the busiest clubs of its kind in SL, but the sim below, being medieval in nature, is also quite unique. DP, or "Boss" as I still call him, is a graphics person IRL, and has several really nice builds on the themed part of the main sim. Please check it out, before you hit the club!
Derren mentioned how nice it was to couples dance. I quite agree.
Until this happens. LOL! I think he tripped over my big clumsy feets!
It is fun to dance "together" for a change, and not just "in synch" on a chim.
Although, sometimes, one looks like one has just been hit by a run away bus. I think I have a broken rib in this picture, and obviously, I spun him too hard and dislocated his right shoulder. *snickers*
Ah, back to, well, as normal as the two of us could be! LOL!! It really was a lovely evening!
And now, for tonight's "Awwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!" shot:
Those are Derren's kittehs in his skybox. They are adorable. They chase each other, fall asleep, tease each other, play ball, love on ya, etc.... They are very cute. I will not buy one. Or two. I will just go there to see them. I will get my "awwww" fix there. I will not buy one. I will not buy one. I will not buy one.............
*GRINS*
(yet)
Sebastian, there will be NO little kittens running around the Kastle anytime soon.
Stop looking at me like that... no. Stop it. Oh, look at that sweet face..... he's so cute! No. No. NO.
NONONONONONO.
*running out of willpower to resist little kittens*
Tel
(Donations to the "Help Tel fight off the "Awwwww" factor" may be sent via direct deposit inworld. This is an SL tax deductible cause, working to help all who are addicted to "cuteness". The money will be used in no way, shape or form to buy kittens. Nope. I promise! *grins*)
Sunday, November 21, 2010
From a Photo Shoot I did last night (and some other stuff)
Ok, here are the first "off home sim" Seasonal pics! I just KNOW that y'all have been waiting for these... c'mon... admit it.... Morning isn't complete w/o a look at my blog and a cuppa Joe! ROFL! (Kidding... I'm not REALLY that arrogant! Y'all can do w/o the coffee! HAHAHAHAHAHA!)
This tree, when I got to the sim to do the photoshoot, nearly made me shit my pants. It is simply exquisite. It's ALSO 246 prims, and 9K L$! There is a smaller version, for the same price, but it is 257 prims! Go figure! Guess I won't have one of them all that soon, eh?
I want this Santa to put out with my reindeer in front of the Kastle. Only three prims. I couldn't find it for sale anywhere, though. *sad face*
This is the only "professional shot" from the evening that I asked for permission to post. I like to leave those for the clients, right? I just loved the "peacefulness" of this one so much, after all the drama I've dealt with lately. This really put me back into a mellow frame of mind.
After the shoot, Derren, who had joined me about half way through, and I went "hopping" to look for other places "in the Spirit". For those that like a more fantasy/modern style.... this is neat!
Yeah, I know. I'm the worst at providing SLurl's. The name of the sim is in the pic titles, though.
I suppose it's because I'm a mid-Westerner in the US in RL, and grew up with the traditional "Currier and Ives" type Christmas' as a kid, but for some reason, Xmas sculptures and palm trees STILL kind of throw me off a bit. LOL!
We sat and talked for about 45 minutes, trying to figure out these floating chairs in the last sim we visited. All we could come up with was that they were either A: Left from the pre holiday build. or B: Just so people would sit and talk about why there were two chairs and a floating wine bottle above the snowmen. LOL!
___________________________________________________________________
After a bit of chatting, Derren had to go nainai, because of the time difference. I hopped back home to catch up some paperwork, and took a couple more shots of the Kastle interior.
Hey, you can't be medieval ALL the time you know. Sometimes you gotta watch soft core porn on YouTube!~ Heehee!
Just catching up some paperwork. XD
Ah, finally the evening was over. I was freezing, and decided a nice long hot bath was just the ticket to relax and warm up...... ZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz..............
*Sleeping peacefully*
Tel
Another Picture Post!!!.....
The "Grand Hall" at the Kastle
Just some stuff "seen around the scene" here at the start of the Holiday Season.... I have been postponing decorating, but my willpower became exactly "zero" the first time that my new "li'l buddy" Derren had me over after he'd partially decorated his place. Hope ya'll enjoy! (This will more than likely be an ongoing theme for the next two months.... deal with it! LOL!)
--------------------------------------------------------------------
First, some pics in and around the Kitteh's Kastle and the Valley (residential area above Tidra):
The main sitting area in the Grand Hall.
Reverse shot.
These little friends showed up to play in the snow in front of the Kastle. Heehee.
Franzi set these outside the new "skating rink". Cute, huh?
Franzi turned our pond/swimming pool into an ice rink for the season. Pretty kewl, eh?
Another shot of the ice rink, duh. LOL!
No matter whether you celebrate Yule, Christmas, or just Winter.... it's almost upon us. May you all be blessed this joyous Season, and let's all hope it GETS WARM AGAIN SOON, DAMMIT! LOL!!!
*Frozenly Yours*
Tel
Friday, November 19, 2010
Just a couple of shots before the snow collapsed the roof on the Kastle
Talkin' with my Sis, Osiloa, owner of Club Industry. My "Bunneh Bootay!", the inimitably hetero Heltir, and a shot of the inside of the club. It was a slow night, but really fun! Derren joined me there later when he logged on.
Freki had already crashed, but this was the day of my first (and probably last, unfortunately) OOC dance at Tabor. It was a lot of fun. I'm sorry I'd not gotten to go in the past. Tidra was a true team that day, and we put them all to shame. Mamba, River,Franzi and moi.
*Peace*
Tel
Monday, November 15, 2010
A short break.....
I think I will take a small break from blogging, until these "fall blues" pass away. I'll be back when there's happy to report!! Love y'all, and Safe Paths!
*Hugs*
Tel
(Just an FYI.... not taking a break from SL, just from the blog... after re-reading my last several posts... I'm on a downward spiral, and just need to not be posting right now.... lol!)
*Hugs*
Tel
(Just an FYI.... not taking a break from SL, just from the blog... after re-reading my last several posts... I'm on a downward spiral, and just need to not be posting right now.... lol!)
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Just found this interesting.....
As many of you know, I'm an avid Facebooker, now. LOL! One of the interesting things is the little horrible-scraps that get delivered to you daily, if you sign up for them. I don't put a lot of stock in them, but sometimes, they are astoundingly accurate.
Your Daily Horoscope 11/14/2010
You may feel locked in a bind of deep emotion and stubborn attitudes with close friends or lovers, Scorpio. Perhaps it's hard for you to say what you really feel. You may be under the impression that you're being tested and judged by everyone else. Try not to let your ego get in the way of a good time. Say what you feel without getting worried about how others will react.
(Imagine that.... a Scorpio with an ego. Heh.)
*Intrigued*
Tel
Your Daily Horoscope 11/14/2010
You may feel locked in a bind of deep emotion and stubborn attitudes with close friends or lovers, Scorpio. Perhaps it's hard for you to say what you really feel. You may be under the impression that you're being tested and judged by everyone else. Try not to let your ego get in the way of a good time. Say what you feel without getting worried about how others will react.
(Imagine that.... a Scorpio with an ego. Heh.)
*Intrigued*
Tel
Friday, November 12, 2010
I Can Haz Job Nau!!!!!
Yes, finally, after 11 long months, I am going to be returning to work. The hours, I think, will be horrible, as at the interview, one of the owners kept asking..."Now, you can work nights and weekends, right?".... like about 30 times in an hour. That doesn't bode well for a "set schedule", like I put on my application. Because of Mom's doctors' appointments, I really need a bit of schedule consistancy, for arranging those. The pay is horrible. I'll be making only about 20-25$ a week more than on my unemployment, but there will be state taxes coming out, on top of the federal and local, which drops the pay back actually below what I draw now. I applied for a manager's job, and ended up with a supervisor's. I am going to have to spend about 20$ a week driving back and forth. I'm actually going to be bringing home less than I was by not working. I don't care, though!
It's a self-respect issue for me. I have my foot back in the door. I am going to be a productive citizen again. All these things mean so much to me, given my upbringing, and personal ethics. I don't start this job for two weeks, and the unemployment lasts (for now) until the end of the month, anyway, so there is a bit of a cushion there. There are still a few other leads to follow up on, and maybe something else will come up, that's more in the pay range that one hopes to find after 30 years in the same industry, but just knowing that there IS a safety net has taken a huge load off my mind.
Now that some inworld tension has ended to the satisfaction of all parties -- three seperate threads of drama imposed by subterfuge... who needs THAT when RL is a mess, right? -- (I think everything is ok now -- you never REALLY know what another person is thinking, eh?) and perhaps RL is easing up slightly, I think that I'm just gonna relax, and make the most of the next two weeks, while still searching for that "dream job" of course.
It IS nice to know that there are people out there that are willing to listen to both sides. The new bosses seem like lovely folks, and I do understand that new businesses have to watch every penny. This might actually be the start of something really good, should they decide to branch out a bit. We'll see!
*Rambling, but happy and soon to be employed again! Yay!!*
Tel
*Just a note on Tidra.... "Dead" gave a collar and cuffs to a soon to be new "Boi" to fit them last night... we've already rp'd his voluntary capture, and had planned his submission for last night, but I had a shot at some more cash work RL, and couldn't turn that down. Hopefully today we can work on that story line some more. Peace out!!!
It's a self-respect issue for me. I have my foot back in the door. I am going to be a productive citizen again. All these things mean so much to me, given my upbringing, and personal ethics. I don't start this job for two weeks, and the unemployment lasts (for now) until the end of the month, anyway, so there is a bit of a cushion there. There are still a few other leads to follow up on, and maybe something else will come up, that's more in the pay range that one hopes to find after 30 years in the same industry, but just knowing that there IS a safety net has taken a huge load off my mind.
Now that some inworld tension has ended to the satisfaction of all parties -- three seperate threads of drama imposed by subterfuge... who needs THAT when RL is a mess, right? -- (I think everything is ok now -- you never REALLY know what another person is thinking, eh?) and perhaps RL is easing up slightly, I think that I'm just gonna relax, and make the most of the next two weeks, while still searching for that "dream job" of course.
It IS nice to know that there are people out there that are willing to listen to both sides. The new bosses seem like lovely folks, and I do understand that new businesses have to watch every penny. This might actually be the start of something really good, should they decide to branch out a bit. We'll see!
*Rambling, but happy and soon to be employed again! Yay!!*
Tel
*Just a note on Tidra.... "Dead" gave a collar and cuffs to a soon to be new "Boi" to fit them last night... we've already rp'd his voluntary capture, and had planned his submission for last night, but I had a shot at some more cash work RL, and couldn't turn that down. Hopefully today we can work on that story line some more. Peace out!!!
Monday, November 8, 2010
A friend started me thinking this morning.....
Today is my birthday, and I'm not in the best of spirits. I had a wonderful evening last night with my RL "not yet a boyfriend"-- dinner, some (ok, a LOT of ) champagne, a couple of nice slow dances back here at the house afterwards (there are no gay bars closer than an hour away, and in a small town, two guys still don't dare dance in a regular bar, ya know?), then a nainai kiss. You'd think this would have me on a high for a couple of days, at least. Heh.
Unfortunately, he can't be around today to shake these "Wow, I just turned 49, and have no job, no money, and no hopes in the near future of either" blues. Amidst the mountains of self pity that I have been piling on today (recovering from the champagne isn't helping... lol... I don't get hangovers, but when I drink THAT much, I tend to depress out the next day.), I received a nice message from a RL friend on Facebook this morning. Not hidden amongst the wall wishes for a happy birthday, or the simply amazing amount of e-cards that I recieved...(Spanki, yours was wonderful... I wish FB had of let me post it!)...all of which I appreciate tremendously, as well as the inworld ones that I got from Franzi and some of my other friends that are also friended to my alts, during my brief time on this morning (as Dead), just a few short lines, in a personal IM:
"(insert RL name), you try too hard to make everyone else happy, and neglect your own emotional health too much. Stop beating yourself up all the time. Remember, when you try to please everyone, you usually end up making most of them unhappy by spreading yourself too thin. You have brightened my life considerably after my divorce, after MY job loss, and the other shit you helped me through. Remember, stay true to yourself, and you will be all that you need to be to the others. I love you, and am very proud and glad to call you my friend. Love, (insert friend's name)"
This started a chain of thought.... perhaps she's right. Sometimes we lose sight of our personal goals, needs and wants in the quest to "please everyone", and immerse ourselves in the "poor little me" syndrome. Having fought clinical depressions for years does not help with this sometimes, but I've also learned to "grab the boot straps" when necessary. I think perhaps I need to quit kicking my own butt over a job situation (and some few others) that is not my fault, and out of my control at this point, and just try to count the blessings.
I have (most) of my health. I have a home (for now). If worse comes to worse, I'll shut up the house, try to sell it, and move back to Mom's. (TOTALLY a last case scenario! Eeeeek!) Until the unemployment runs out at the end of the month, I have learned to live on less than half of what I used to make, and actually, have learned that I don't "need" all the perqs. I have never been a massive "consumer", but I have enough of the "stuff" to make me happy.
It's been a rough lesson, but I think, with that one message, I now know that my life isn't that bad compared to some. I realized after her words hit me like a lightning bolt that, yes, I DO spread myself a bit thin at times (just NOT in the waistline these days, unfortunately! LOL!!) and perhaps spend too much time trying to please others, sometimes to my own self-detriment. I think what shook me the most, was that I had no idea that I had affected her life that deeply. To know that you have been a positive influence on others, makes it all seem more worthwhile I think. That simple, heart-felt thank you of hers, and the little kick in the pants, meant so very much.
Maybe it's time for a little reprioritizing again. After all, if you can't love yourself, you are incapable of loving others, right? I also know, through that, and the other messages I received, both RL and SL, that I am loved, or at least liked, by many that I am "just me" with. That's a good feeling.
*With sincere gratitude for all his friends and loved ones in every world*
Tel
Unfortunately, he can't be around today to shake these "Wow, I just turned 49, and have no job, no money, and no hopes in the near future of either" blues. Amidst the mountains of self pity that I have been piling on today (recovering from the champagne isn't helping... lol... I don't get hangovers, but when I drink THAT much, I tend to depress out the next day.), I received a nice message from a RL friend on Facebook this morning. Not hidden amongst the wall wishes for a happy birthday, or the simply amazing amount of e-cards that I recieved...(Spanki, yours was wonderful... I wish FB had of let me post it!)...all of which I appreciate tremendously, as well as the inworld ones that I got from Franzi and some of my other friends that are also friended to my alts, during my brief time on this morning (as Dead), just a few short lines, in a personal IM:
"(insert RL name), you try too hard to make everyone else happy, and neglect your own emotional health too much. Stop beating yourself up all the time. Remember, when you try to please everyone, you usually end up making most of them unhappy by spreading yourself too thin. You have brightened my life considerably after my divorce, after MY job loss, and the other shit you helped me through. Remember, stay true to yourself, and you will be all that you need to be to the others. I love you, and am very proud and glad to call you my friend. Love, (insert friend's name)"
This started a chain of thought.... perhaps she's right. Sometimes we lose sight of our personal goals, needs and wants in the quest to "please everyone", and immerse ourselves in the "poor little me" syndrome. Having fought clinical depressions for years does not help with this sometimes, but I've also learned to "grab the boot straps" when necessary. I think perhaps I need to quit kicking my own butt over a job situation (and some few others) that is not my fault, and out of my control at this point, and just try to count the blessings.
I have (most) of my health. I have a home (for now). If worse comes to worse, I'll shut up the house, try to sell it, and move back to Mom's. (TOTALLY a last case scenario! Eeeeek!) Until the unemployment runs out at the end of the month, I have learned to live on less than half of what I used to make, and actually, have learned that I don't "need" all the perqs. I have never been a massive "consumer", but I have enough of the "stuff" to make me happy.
It's been a rough lesson, but I think, with that one message, I now know that my life isn't that bad compared to some. I realized after her words hit me like a lightning bolt that, yes, I DO spread myself a bit thin at times (just NOT in the waistline these days, unfortunately! LOL!!) and perhaps spend too much time trying to please others, sometimes to my own self-detriment. I think what shook me the most, was that I had no idea that I had affected her life that deeply. To know that you have been a positive influence on others, makes it all seem more worthwhile I think. That simple, heart-felt thank you of hers, and the little kick in the pants, meant so very much.
Maybe it's time for a little reprioritizing again. After all, if you can't love yourself, you are incapable of loving others, right? I also know, through that, and the other messages I received, both RL and SL, that I am loved, or at least liked, by many that I am "just me" with. That's a good feeling.
*With sincere gratitude for all his friends and loved ones in every world*
Tel
Sunday, November 7, 2010
For those that don't quite "get" us Scorpios.....
Found this on a Google search. Love the yin-yang aspect of it.
This person's "work" here is spot on, and shows excellent insight into what makes us Scorp's "tick". We are very complex, achieving heights of inspiration, and depths of despair, possibly more so than many of the other Signs. There is rarely a "middle ground" for us, and while we see all aspects of a situation intuitively, many times, we also tend to look at things in a "black or white" manner. Domineering, intense, frequently highly intelligent and empathetic, uncompromising, fiercely loyal, both to others and to our own "moral compass", we embody the entire gambit of human personalities within one spirit.
We are prone to extremes, both in our loves and our hatreds. We would prefer to be alone and sexless unless we can get the same commitment back. Few others can reach the depths of passion that a Scorp achieve and engender, both positive and negative. We are arrogant, and aloof, but mostly as a defense mechanism, because we "feel" on a very deep level. If you think we are confusing and frustrating to YOU at times, try living that daily! LOL!
Oh, did I mention that we are the Sign that empowers the genitals? *grins* Just thought I'd throw that in there. For anyone that doesn't quite "get" us, Blue Light Lady does an excellent job of exposing some of our inner workings. She also does great work on the other Signs, as well. I hope this explains what I lack the language to, not to mention the time to do the research and writing on!
*With typical Scorpionic Multiplicity*
Tel
Did a little redecorating.....
Not really much to blog about today, just wanted to post a pic of the Kitteh's Kastle now that I've completely redone the gardens, etc. Boredom and frustration are best dealt with artistically, and I've had a bit of both recently. RL has kept me from being on much when my closest friends are, so SL has been a bit lonely. RL has also been a bit of a "astral sword swinging, screaming Ban-Sidh" lately, what with the massive job searching, Mom's health slipping a bit with the weather change, and my arthritis driving me nuts... lol. I want my 85 degree weather back! At least I'm warm when the joints start throbbing, right? Ha!
Anyway, necessity is NOT the mother of invention/creation. Boredom is. I've been teaching myself how to make sculpts. While not entirely successful yet...... like someone with OCD ever is, right, no matter how mild it's form?..... that actually is progressing fairly well. I've made some simple stuff like columns, torches, and am working on some low prim simple furniture atm. I have two inworld programs that I use... one that Franzi pointed me to, which is great for items that are made from basic prim shapes, and has a fully functional free-version on Marketplace, if you build in their sandbox, and one that is better for more "organic" shapes, based on a "disc editing" template. I've also been trying to teach myself to use Blendr, but the UI on it is NOT user friendly for old farts that are not that technologically bent. LOL!
Anyway, here's the pic of the Kastle in it's new surroundings.... floating high above the main sim of Tidra. Come visit!
*Yawns and heads for (more) coffee*
Tel
Anyway, necessity is NOT the mother of invention/creation. Boredom is. I've been teaching myself how to make sculpts. While not entirely successful yet...... like someone with OCD ever is, right, no matter how mild it's form?..... that actually is progressing fairly well. I've made some simple stuff like columns, torches, and am working on some low prim simple furniture atm. I have two inworld programs that I use... one that Franzi pointed me to, which is great for items that are made from basic prim shapes, and has a fully functional free-version on Marketplace, if you build in their sandbox, and one that is better for more "organic" shapes, based on a "disc editing" template. I've also been trying to teach myself to use Blendr, but the UI on it is NOT user friendly for old farts that are not that technologically bent. LOL!
Anyway, here's the pic of the Kastle in it's new surroundings.... floating high above the main sim of Tidra. Come visit!
Tel
Friday, November 5, 2010
New Story Line for "Lion"
As you know (or should by now!!! LOL!!) I am the King of Alts, or so I've been named by a few. Actually, there are still just the five of us, and I know many that have quite a few more. One of them, Ganymede, the third oldest of "us", is a Savage on Tidra Isle, known as "Lion",along with his twin, the first Teleny, known as "Lynx". There hasn't been any RP as of late with the savage tribe, since Franzi has been working on his rebuild of the Fort/city and I was working on Dead's tavern, so I decided to start a seperate line of my own, just to see if I can up that aspect of the "game" here. I've been out of this type of RP a while, so bear with me. (This couldn't be any longer today, because of some RL stuff, but I'm going to try to flesh this out a bit in the near future, to hopefully bring a few more savages back to the island, since we've reopened for business.)
_____________________________________________________________________
The Lion returns to his island home, after a long absence, only to find his brothers missing. He searches the jungles, and the camp, only to find no one. The gardens are untended, the poor "liberated" bosk cow is scrawny and in desperate need of food and water. Above all these mundane concerns, he's worried. In the past, he was always greeted by his tribe, and most especially by his twin, with whom he shares a deep love that only twins can know. He sets about tending the plants and the bosk.
[04:56] MG Magic Vegetable Crop Dirt 2.01: Ganymede Sparta carefully waters the eggplant.
[04:56] MG Magic Vegetable Crop Dirt 2.01: Ganymede Sparta sprays for bugs around the plants.
[04:56] MG Magic Vegetable Crop Dirt 2.01: Ganymede Sparta carefully waters the green peppers.
[04:56] MG Magic Vegetable Crop Dirt 2.01: Ganymede Sparta sprays for bugs around the plants.
[04:57] MG Magic Vegetable Crop Dirt 2.01: Ganymede Sparta places some green peppers seed in the unfertilized soil.
[04:57] MG Magic Vegetable Crop Dirt 2.01: Ganymede Sparta carefully waters the green peppers.
[04:57] MG Magic Vegetable Crop Dirt 2.01: Ganymede Sparta carefully waters the green beans.
[04:57] MG Magic Vegetable Crop Dirt 2.01: Ganymede Sparta yanks weeds from the dirt.
[04:59] Ganymede Sparta looks with disdain upon the neglected plants as he tends to them. "I wonder where all my brothers have gone while I was away?"
[05:00] Ganymede Sparta wanders over to the poor skinny bosk cow hidden under the furs, and feeds her, and suddenly grimaces as he notices her ribs are showing.
[05:00] Ganymede Sparta: "I get you water, be back."
[05:00] Ganymede Sparta picks up the bucket, and heads down to the river to fetch the water.
[05:01] Ganymede Sparta dips the pail into the water, concerned that something has happened to his brothers in the tribe.
[05:02] Ganymede Sparta: Carrying the sloshing pail, he heads slowly and worriedly back up the hill.
[05:06] Ganymede Sparta shuts the gate, and drops the bar to prevent unwanted intrusion, removes his weapons, and lays down to sleep.
[05:06] Ganymede Sparta removes his loincloth, and covering himself in the furs, makes himself comfortable.
[05:06] Ganymede Sparta lays restlessly, looking out the door of the hut, wondering about the missing tribe with deep concern.
[05:07] Ganymede Sparta is especially worried and missing his twin, Lynx, since they have never been parted since birth.
[05:07] Ganymede Sparta knows that he must be rested and fed in order to search for his brother and the rest of the tribe, especially if he has to fight the Stone Camp people, whom he distrusts
[05:07] Ganymede Sparta and always has, but especially since they have encroached more on his beloved jungle with their new larger camp.
[05:08] Ganymede Sparta weeps softly at missing his brother and the rest of the tribe, and from his own exhaustion.
[05:08] Ganymede Sparta mumbles softly to himself....."I will find you, Lynx."
[05:08] Ganymede Sparta: Missing his brother and the rest of his tribe badly, he dozes off into a fitful sleep.
________________________________________________________
Like I said, it's not much, and quite possibly, not the best RP ever set on paper. (Ya think?!?! LOL!) It's a start though. We have RP started back in the Fort/city now, so I'll try to contact the other savages, and get that line going again as well, as many of them are more in my "time zone". Come Play!!
*Glad we're back in business*
Tel
_____________________________________________________________________
The Lion returns to his island home, after a long absence, only to find his brothers missing. He searches the jungles, and the camp, only to find no one. The gardens are untended, the poor "liberated" bosk cow is scrawny and in desperate need of food and water. Above all these mundane concerns, he's worried. In the past, he was always greeted by his tribe, and most especially by his twin, with whom he shares a deep love that only twins can know. He sets about tending the plants and the bosk.
[04:56] MG Magic Vegetable Crop Dirt 2.01: Ganymede Sparta carefully waters the eggplant.
[04:56] MG Magic Vegetable Crop Dirt 2.01: Ganymede Sparta sprays for bugs around the plants.
[04:56] MG Magic Vegetable Crop Dirt 2.01: Ganymede Sparta carefully waters the green peppers.
[04:56] MG Magic Vegetable Crop Dirt 2.01: Ganymede Sparta sprays for bugs around the plants.
[04:57] MG Magic Vegetable Crop Dirt 2.01: Ganymede Sparta places some green peppers seed in the unfertilized soil.
[04:57] MG Magic Vegetable Crop Dirt 2.01: Ganymede Sparta carefully waters the green peppers.
[04:57] MG Magic Vegetable Crop Dirt 2.01: Ganymede Sparta carefully waters the green beans.
[04:57] MG Magic Vegetable Crop Dirt 2.01: Ganymede Sparta yanks weeds from the dirt.
[04:59] Ganymede Sparta looks with disdain upon the neglected plants as he tends to them. "I wonder where all my brothers have gone while I was away?"
[05:00] Ganymede Sparta wanders over to the poor skinny bosk cow hidden under the furs, and feeds her, and suddenly grimaces as he notices her ribs are showing.
[05:00] Ganymede Sparta: "I get you water, be back."
[05:00] Ganymede Sparta picks up the bucket, and heads down to the river to fetch the water.
[05:01] Ganymede Sparta dips the pail into the water, concerned that something has happened to his brothers in the tribe.
[05:02] Ganymede Sparta: Carrying the sloshing pail, he heads slowly and worriedly back up the hill.
[05:06] Ganymede Sparta shuts the gate, and drops the bar to prevent unwanted intrusion, removes his weapons, and lays down to sleep.
[05:06] Ganymede Sparta removes his loincloth, and covering himself in the furs, makes himself comfortable.
[05:06] Ganymede Sparta lays restlessly, looking out the door of the hut, wondering about the missing tribe with deep concern.
[05:07] Ganymede Sparta is especially worried and missing his twin, Lynx, since they have never been parted since birth.
[05:07] Ganymede Sparta knows that he must be rested and fed in order to search for his brother and the rest of the tribe, especially if he has to fight the Stone Camp people, whom he distrusts
[05:07] Ganymede Sparta and always has, but especially since they have encroached more on his beloved jungle with their new larger camp.
[05:08] Ganymede Sparta weeps softly at missing his brother and the rest of the tribe, and from his own exhaustion.
[05:08] Ganymede Sparta mumbles softly to himself....."I will find you, Lynx."
[05:08] Ganymede Sparta: Missing his brother and the rest of his tribe badly, he dozes off into a fitful sleep.
________________________________________________________
Like I said, it's not much, and quite possibly, not the best RP ever set on paper. (Ya think?!?! LOL!) It's a start though. We have RP started back in the Fort/city now, so I'll try to contact the other savages, and get that line going again as well, as many of them are more in my "time zone". Come Play!!
*Glad we're back in business*
Tel
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Well, this is gonna be interesting......
The Republicans have taken back control of the House of Reperesentatives here in the U.S. The Democrats retained control, although by less of a margin than before, of the Senate. We have a Democratic President. I suspect we will have a dead stalemate for the next two years, now, and nothing will get accomplished. What makes it bad, for me personally, because I think they are ALL crooks, is the unemployment issue.
The Republicans were the ones that held up the Federal extensions for the long term unemployed before. If they do that again when this cycle runs out, many of us stand to lose everything... our houses, our cars, our self-respect. (Personally, self- respect and the "sense of well-being" have been a bit low these days anyway, for many reasons. Thank all the gods that mankind has ever created for my RL "not yet a boyfriend". He's a very stable individual, and reaffirms and recenters me a lot.) These benefits are due to run out Nov. 30th, and though they don't "actually" take charge until January, I see no reason why they would compromise now. Many of us are not unemployed because we don't want to work, but through factors out of our personal control. I've never been unemployed more than a week before in my adult life.
I guess we'll just have to see what happens, right?
As for SL and the RP on the home sim.... I guess it started again yesterday. One of the savages captured a lost young man in the jungles, and bartered to trade him to the Fortress people. (So I was told later, as I was unable to be inworld yesterday.) The parties involved will have to blog about that, as I wasn't a part of that due to RL reasons. Hopefully we'll see something on the other sim-related blogs soon, but just lettin' y'all know that, for practical purposes, Tidra is back up and running again. Come play! (I won't be inworld as much during the day now, for the reasons I mentioned earlier, which means I'll miss a lot, if not most, of the beginning of the new RP lines... I am gonna have to find "something"... even if only minimum wage and part time. If I lose my house, I lose Mom's too, because we tied the properties together for tax purposes. Can't let that happen. It's not fair to her. She worked to damned hard after the divorce to get back on her feet, and besides, she's my mother, right? *smiles a bit wanly*)
*Emotionally exhausted and a lot blue these days*
Tel
The Republicans were the ones that held up the Federal extensions for the long term unemployed before. If they do that again when this cycle runs out, many of us stand to lose everything... our houses, our cars, our self-respect. (Personally, self- respect and the "sense of well-being" have been a bit low these days anyway, for many reasons. Thank all the gods that mankind has ever created for my RL "not yet a boyfriend". He's a very stable individual, and reaffirms and recenters me a lot.) These benefits are due to run out Nov. 30th, and though they don't "actually" take charge until January, I see no reason why they would compromise now. Many of us are not unemployed because we don't want to work, but through factors out of our personal control. I've never been unemployed more than a week before in my adult life.
I guess we'll just have to see what happens, right?
As for SL and the RP on the home sim.... I guess it started again yesterday. One of the savages captured a lost young man in the jungles, and bartered to trade him to the Fortress people. (So I was told later, as I was unable to be inworld yesterday.) The parties involved will have to blog about that, as I wasn't a part of that due to RL reasons. Hopefully we'll see something on the other sim-related blogs soon, but just lettin' y'all know that, for practical purposes, Tidra is back up and running again. Come play! (I won't be inworld as much during the day now, for the reasons I mentioned earlier, which means I'll miss a lot, if not most, of the beginning of the new RP lines... I am gonna have to find "something"... even if only minimum wage and part time. If I lose my house, I lose Mom's too, because we tied the properties together for tax purposes. Can't let that happen. It's not fair to her. She worked to damned hard after the divorce to get back on her feet, and besides, she's my mother, right? *smiles a bit wanly*)
*Emotionally exhausted and a lot blue these days*
Tel
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
A brand new day!!!!!
Don't you love it when you can resolve issues, and move on to a new found happiness and peace of mind? XD!
It's a good day! One way or the other, the election here in the US is upon us. We'll have the endless cycle of legal challenges, etc., but at least no more of those nasty "This is what THEY did to you, while I won't tell you anything that I'll do FOR you!" ads on TV and so on. Several personal matters have been resolved, at least to the point that there is a renewed optimism for the future, and I have a couple more job interviews this week! *crossing fingers*.... Have a GREAT day, friends!
*Peace*
Tel
It's a good day! One way or the other, the election here in the US is upon us. We'll have the endless cycle of legal challenges, etc., but at least no more of those nasty "This is what THEY did to you, while I won't tell you anything that I'll do FOR you!" ads on TV and so on. Several personal matters have been resolved, at least to the point that there is a renewed optimism for the future, and I have a couple more job interviews this week! *crossing fingers*.... Have a GREAT day, friends!
*Peace*
Tel
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